For those who new Ronnie Barker - Printable Version +- Forums (https://www.theblitz.club/message_boards) +-- Forum: The Parade Ground (https://www.theblitz.club/message_boards/forumdisplay.php?fid=2) +--- Forum: General Discussions (https://www.theblitz.club/message_boards/forumdisplay.php?fid=86) +--- Thread: For those who new Ronnie Barker (/showthread.php?tid=51745)

For those who new Ronnie Barker - Hedgehog - 06-13-2009 This was originally shown on BBC TV back in the 70's. Ronnie Barker could say all this without a snigger, though God knows after how many takes. The irony is, BBC received not one complaint. The speed of delivery must have been too much for the whining herds. Try getting through it without converting the spoonerisms [and not wetting your pants] as you read....... This is the story of Rindercella and her sugly isters. Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella worked very hard frubbing sloors, emptying poss pits, and shivelling shot. At the end of the day, she was knucking fackered. The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge, and the other was called Betty Swallocks; they were really forrible huckers; they had fetty sweet and fatty swannies. The sugly isters had tickets to go to the ball, but the cotton runts would not let Rindercella go. Suddenly there was a bucking fang, and her gairy fodmother appeared. Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light rucking fesbian. She turned a pumpkin and six mite wice into a hucking cuge farriage with six dandy ronkeys who had buge hollocks and digbicks. The gairy fodmother told Rindercella to be back by dimnlight otherwise, there would be a cucking falamity. At the ball, Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly the clock struck twelve. "Mist all chucking frighty!!!" said Rindercella, and she ran out tripping barse over ollocks, so dropping her slass glipper. The very next day, the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the sugly isters let him in.. Suddenly, Betty Swallocks lifted her leg and let off a fig bart. "Who's fust jarted?" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame that fugly ucker over there!!" said Mary Hinge. When the stinking brown cloud had lifted, he tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without success and their feet stucking funk. Betty Swallocks was ducking fisgusted and gave the prandsome hince a knack in the kickers. This was not difficult as he had bucking fuge halls and a hig bard on. He tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly. Rindercella and the prandsome hince were married. The pransome hince lived his life in lucking fuxury, and Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny! RE: For those who new Ronnie Barker - Joe98 - 06-15-2009 Very good ! The 2 Ronnies were a great team. - RE: For those who new Ronnie Barker - Trojan - 06-29-2009 Awesome! It was really aired on BBC? RE: For those who new Ronnie Barker - Stryker - 06-30-2009 I can confirm it was really aired on the BBC, I used to watch the two Ronnies all the time and remember this well.. he delivered it very quickly so you didn't really get time to think about what he'd just said.. apart from laughing a lot at the same time... classic Search out the "four candles / fork handles" sketch too.... it's a bit dated but good fun. Edit - here it is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cz2-ukrd2VQ RE: For those who new Ronnie Barker - Trojan - 06-30-2009 Oh I know that one, in the shop. Hilarious! Corbett: 'Have you met my wife before?' Barker: 'Sod her' Corbett: 'I beg your pardon!' Barker: 'Bicarbonate Soda' :happy: