Lets have a smile

[Hedgehog]

TWO OLD MEN DECIDE THEY ARE CLOSE TO THEIR LAST DAYS AND DECIDE
TO HAVE A LAST NIGHT ON THE TOWN. AFTER A FEW DRINKS, THEY END UP AT THE
LOCAL BROTHEL.
THE MADAM TAKES ONE LOOK AT THE TWO OLD GEEZERS AND WHISPERS TO
HER MANAGER, "GO UP TO THE FIRST TWO BEDROOMS AND PUT AN INFLATED DOLL IN
EACH BED. THESE TWO ARE SO OLD AND DRUNK, I'M NOT WASTING TWO OF MY GIRLS
ON THEM. THEY WON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE." THE MANAGER DOES AS HE IS TOLD
AND THE TWO OLD MEN GO UPSTAIRS AND TAKE CARE OF THEIR BUSINESS.
AS THEY ARE WALKING HOME THE FIRST MAN SAYS, "YOU KNOW, I THINK
MY GIRL WAS DEAD!" "DEAD?" SAYS HIS FRIEND, "WHY DO YOU SAY THAT?
"WELL, SHE NEVER MOVED OR MADE A SOUND ALL THE TIME I WAS LOVING
HER." HIS FRIEND SAYS, "COULD BE WORSE. I THINK MINE WAS A WITCH."
" A WITCH, WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU SAY THAT?"
"WELL, I WAS MAKING LOVE TO HER, KISSING HER ON THE NECK AND I
GAVE HER A LITTLE BITE, THEN SHE FARTED AND FLEW OUT THE WINDOW

-----------------------------------------------------------
Three women go down to Mexico one night to celebrate college graduation,
get drunk, and wake up in jail, only to find that they are to be executed
in the morning, though none of them can remember what they did the night
before.

The first one, a redhead, is strapped in the electric chair and is asked
if she has any last words. She says, "I just graduated from Trinity Bible
College and believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on the
behalf of the innocent."

They throw the switch and nothing happens. They all immediately fall to
the floor on their knees, beg for forgiveness,and release her.

The second one, a brunette, is strapped in and gives her last words. "I
just graduated from the Harvard School of Law and I believe in the power
of justice to intervene on the part of the innocent."

They throw the switch and again, nothing happens. Again they all
immediately fall to their knees, beg for forgiveness and
release her.

The last one (you knew it), a blonde, is strapped in and says, "Well, I'm
from Kansas University and just graduated with a degree in
Electrical Engineering, and I'll tell ya right now, ya'll ain't gonna
electrocute nobody if you don't plug this thing in