TOTAL RE-COIL: The Battle for Taco Village (Coil no Entry... you Bastad)

[Copper]

"Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when it has gone past me I will turn to see fear's path. Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.(a fat bastard-esque protracted squeaking one cheek sneak proceeds for about 30 seconds, with a small dribble of wetter sounding flatulence, and then the quote ends)"

-Paul, son of Leto

You see, this is what happens when you preach tactics, provide tips and outline both through DAR's of your own for all the world to see, and eventually the world adopts them and then hone them to a fine art; to the level where it's emulated so well that you may end up getting your own arse kicked.

Le rueful Coil has admitted to me (as if it were not obvious) that he has taken this one completely from my own playbook, admiring the hetzer-grille combo used to whoop the ole polecat Colonel T.

Let me outline once again (shudder... I'm an idiot). Each Grille is protected by its own hetzer (usually the same frontal shell bouncing propensity of a brumbar), effectively giving you a long range killing machine, and an anti infantry nightmare rolled up into one neat little package of two units working in conjunction. As you see below, Le abominable Coil is replicating this tactic, sans the hetzers, and using StuG's instead:



Not to mention he has two other panzers in the field moving forward, and a hidden panzer IV in the backfield working overwatch duty, just in case my M-10's try to pull a flank manuever on his approach route.

I also notice that the 4th grille has appeared, and that whay I killed in pic a nic valley, may indeed be an armored car (drat). This is highly perplexing, and now I am cursed with the need to actually think about this one for a bit before sending out the new turn (perhaps thinking at a bit of a healthier clip earlier may have prevented this impromptu need to think now... but I better not think too much about that... counterfactual thinking is often unproductive, and is not a significant characteristic of risk taking personalities... which come to think of it, I am not... damn... thinking too much about the wrong things...

I think I'm in trouble.

The way I see it, I have two options... full retreat, or stay and take it in the ass. Le smelly one has enough HE to level a large Japanese industrial city, and thus will no doubt tear apart the entire countryside as he advances. So much for the Taco shells remaining undamaged.

I can continue to smoke the approaches as my triplets to the west have about 21 smoke shells each... but this becomes a dangerous game as a panzer can slip in under the smoke and pot one of my howies while he leisurely puffs away.

In instances like this, the Yanks just call in air support or artillery, and sit back and enjoy Miller time... but the bulk of the forces are Canadian, and thus we don't move to the same beat... (okay, we don't have planes and artillery... lots of rocks.. somehow they seem to magically appear in our fields every spring before seeding).

As this is turn 21 of a 30 variable game, I may need to survive another 15 turns of this... and Le putrific Coil is barreling down on the Taco Factory as if it were... uhm... well... a Taco Factory (drooool).

Time to think think think... perhaps strap a few demo charges to the livestock and stampede them into the german armor... maybe let Lance Corporal Burnbrough use his innate ability to speak with nature and cause the trees to uproot and come to our aide? Speaking of aide, where are our loyal allies, the British? Loafing Tommies... drinking tee and chewing scones with horrorshow grins I reckon.

DAMN DAMN DAMN... I suppose I could do what everybody else I play does when I am whooping them... just slow my turn rate down so that it barely meets the 3 week minimum keeping the game from being recorded by abandonment...

I'll get back to you guys soon... (insert plethora of Coil curses here)

Cheers!

Leto