THE BLITZ EXTREME CAGE MATCH: COL T vs [hirr]Leto

[Copper]

I'm bucking for a post at the New York Times... or perhaps better suited, Mad magazine: four readers!

The morning turn: el Davo is down but not out, and roars like a nerdy jewish pharmacisct in a desperate counterattack!



My Panther decides to pop a few infantrymen while waiting for his brothers to join him... bad idea. Dave is a pasty white, noodle armed, nerd boy, but even his type can be dangerous in close:



Amazingly, the Stuart with a 99% to hit for sitting his ass in the wors possible place to be on the entire map, takes an 88 shell to the turret... but SURVIVES! Gun damage no less, and it retreats out of the fray... the Stuart is ELITE. What that means is that only a knocked out result will cause the crew to bail (cause the crew will be dead). I've noticed this before, and all of you should know that the percentage chance of abandoning a stricken or hit AFV GOES DOWN with the experience they have... So really, any other level of experience for the stuart would have resulted in a bail. Last word on this: ever notice why so many AFV's do not survive 50/50 kill percentages? Well if your boys are regulars or even worse, greens, the crew will abandon... watch your AFV kills in your next game and you will notice that most of the kills are abandons... that means the tank is still partially functional, but the crew has had enough.

And now to my pretty pickle (I bet that is what Hans brother sweetly told Klaus on that moonlit night back in Hamburg... little did Klaus know that Hansellete was packing a baby gherkin her/hiself):



Boom boom boom let's go back to my room. Four tanks. three with soft shots on my kitty... it shrugs off a side turret hit from the Tac Am, the Tac Am in the distance misses, and the Stuart punches a partial penetration into the upper hull... but the kitty fights on!

But now what do I do?



Don't cry for me Argentina... I'm certain the panther will bail on the next hit... the crew are regulars... knocking my cat out will put us back square in this game, as Dave's only lost 2 Tac ams, 1 churchill, and a stuart to GD... taking out my Panther with a Stuart or Tac Am will be a fate worse than death, and even if Dave loses, a point of teasing that will last for eons.

EL DAVEO LOADS UP WITH A MERCURY FILLED GLOVE, REACHES FOR A TWO BY FOUR AND LUNGES AT LETO... OH THE HUMANITY!!!

This will be tense. Let's see how thick my head really is.

Cheers!

Leto