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Joke of the day thread
05-16-2008, 10:30 PM,
#14
RE: Joke of the day thread
Sick jokes: Big Grin

How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face?

She answered the iron.


How did Helen Keller burn the other side of her face?

They called back.


How did Helen Keller burn her fingers?

Reading the waffle iron.


How did Helen Keller break her arm riding down the road?

Reading the stop sign.


What kind of wood don't float?

Natalie Wood.


Why didn't Natalie Wood shower on the yacht that night?

She preferred to wash up on shore.


Mommy, Mommy, why do I keep walking in circles?

Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!


Dad I hate sister's guts!

Shut up and eat whats's on your plate.


Mommy cna we have grandma for dinner?

No, we still have half of Aunt May in the fridge.


Mommy, Mommy, daddy fell off the roof!

I know dear, he just passed the window.


What's blue and sits in the corner?

A baby with a plastic bag on his head.


What's green and sits in the corner?

Same baby three days later.


What's red and goes brrump brrrump brrrump?

A baby playing with an electric fan.


Daddy, I want a new dog.

Shut up, we haven't finished eating the old one yet.
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Messages In This Thread
Joke of the day thread - by Montana Mud - 04-24-2008, 12:13 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Tide1 - 04-25-2008, 07:02 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Thunder - 04-25-2008, 07:31 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Tide1 - 04-25-2008, 07:37 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Montana Mud - 04-25-2008, 12:32 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Steel God - 04-25-2008, 09:30 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 04-28-2008, 08:45 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by PzHeinZ - 05-15-2008, 08:25 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by RedDevil - 05-15-2008, 08:36 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by RedDevil - 05-15-2008, 08:47 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Montana Mud - 05-16-2008, 01:35 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Outlaw Josey Wales - 05-16-2008, 10:30 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by PzHeinZ - 05-19-2008, 07:37 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 05-24-2008, 04:06 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by PzHeinZ - 05-25-2008, 12:03 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Weasel - 05-25-2008, 07:06 AM
This one made me laugh pretty good. - by Weasel - 05-25-2008, 07:13 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Montana Mud - 05-27-2008, 03:08 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 06-05-2008, 05:55 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 06-13-2008, 07:02 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 06-20-2008, 06:41 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by McIvan - 06-27-2008, 08:42 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 08-03-2008, 05:06 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by keepitloki - 08-04-2008, 08:49 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Stryker - 08-05-2008, 07:49 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 08-07-2008, 07:50 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 08-09-2008, 04:01 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by James Ward - 08-28-2008, 04:24 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Extraordinarius - 08-30-2008, 10:16 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by bluehand - 08-31-2008, 04:38 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Greybeard - 09-12-2008, 01:22 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 02-03-2010, 03:18 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 02-04-2010, 07:37 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 02-12-2010, 09:02 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 03-26-2010, 07:31 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Foreigner - 04-01-2010, 02:14 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Gasbag - 04-24-2010, 06:13 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Gasbag - 04-25-2010, 12:46 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 04-25-2010, 11:22 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Gasbag - 05-14-2010, 06:57 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 05-21-2010, 02:05 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Foreigner - 05-26-2010, 02:35 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 07-04-2010, 09:10 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 08-25-2010, 03:49 AM
Black Testicles - by Compass Rose - 10-06-2010, 09:56 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Kingmaker - 12-01-2010, 11:15 PM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Foreigner - 12-03-2010, 08:00 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Pointman - 02-13-2011, 03:45 AM
The Firefighter - by Compass Rose - 02-14-2011, 12:35 AM
And thats how the fight started - by Iwo Jim - 02-16-2011, 10:54 AM
The Irish Robber - by Compass Rose - 02-20-2011, 03:50 AM
RE: Joke of the day thread - by Dangerfield - 06-20-2011, 02:23 PM
Glasgow School Quiz - by Hedgehog - 08-02-2008, 07:15 PM
RE: Glasgow School Quiz - by Hedgehog - 08-02-2008, 07:23 PM
RE: Glasgow School Quiz - by Copper - 08-03-2008, 01:55 AM
For Gloomy Wednesday - by Hedgehog - 08-06-2008, 11:36 PM
Dear Dad - by Steel God - 08-07-2008, 12:44 AM
RE: Dear Dad - by Copper - 08-07-2008, 12:55 AM
RE: Dear Dad - by wigam - 08-07-2008, 09:51 AM
Combat Mission: Bugs Bunny - by Mad Baron - 08-07-2008, 09:52 AM
A bit of military humour - by Walrus - 08-07-2008, 11:31 AM
RE: A bit of military humour - by wigam - 08-07-2008, 11:37 AM
RE: A bit of military humour - by Hedgehog - 08-07-2008, 08:20 PM
RE: Dear Dad - by Thunder - 08-08-2008, 02:11 AM
Priceless - by Steel God - 08-08-2008, 04:45 AM
RE: Priceless - by Mr Grumpy - 08-08-2008, 05:41 AM
RE: Priceless - by Thunder - 08-08-2008, 06:08 AM
RE: Priceless - by wigam - 08-08-2008, 09:34 AM
RE: Priceless - by Mad Russian - 08-08-2008, 09:50 AM
RE: Priceless - by PoorOldSpike - 08-08-2008, 12:28 PM
Two Plastic Bags - by Hedgehog - 07-25-2010, 08:05 AM
Rrriiiiinnnnggg, rrriiiinnnngg, - by Hedgehog - 08-06-2010, 06:31 PM
Little Bruce and Jenny - by Hedgehog - 08-08-2010, 08:16 AM
Old School Mates - by Hedgehog - 08-17-2010, 06:00 PM
Master Card Wedding - by Hedgehog - 08-22-2010, 07:46 AM
Priceless Observation Department - by Hedgehog - 08-22-2010, 07:52 AM
Can you get Married in Heaven - by Hedgehog - 08-22-2010, 07:54 AM
RE: Can you get Married in Heaven - by Foreigner - 08-24-2010, 06:24 AM
RE: Can you get Married in Heaven - by Hedgehog - 08-24-2010, 07:49 AM
Global facts about Sex - by Hedgehog - 08-30-2010, 07:36 AM
LORD, THEY ARE FINALLY TOGETHER... - by Hedgehog - 09-10-2010, 07:44 AM
New Prostate Check Procedure - by Hedgehog - 09-15-2010, 08:11 AM
Six Truths of Life - by Hedgehog - 09-18-2010, 07:35 PM
New guy - by Ashcloud - 09-21-2010, 06:02 AM
RE: New guy - by Hedgehog - 09-21-2010, 07:44 AM
The Four Cat's - by Hedgehog - 09-21-2010, 07:47 AM
Wine does not make you FAT - by Hedgehog - 09-21-2010, 05:43 PM
Dedicated CM Player - by Hedgehog - 09-29-2010, 07:59 AM
GOODBYE MOM - by Hedgehog - 10-02-2010, 07:45 AM
HOW TRUE IT IS - by Hedgehog - 10-06-2010, 11:57 PM
EVE'S SIDE OF THE STORY - by Hedgehog - 10-06-2010, 11:59 PM
Job Application - by Hedgehog - 10-08-2010, 07:44 AM
RE: Job Application - by Bear - 10-08-2010, 12:39 PM
Lipstick in School - by Hedgehog - 10-14-2010, 05:52 PM
Trust a Pilot - by Hedgehog - 10-16-2010, 05:55 PM
Liverpool benefits office, - by Hedgehog - 10-19-2010, 08:09 AM
Old Age Golf - by Hedgehog - 10-22-2010, 07:10 PM
Your Favourite Pub - by Hedgehog - 10-26-2010, 05:46 PM
The Promised Land - by Hedgehog - 10-31-2010, 07:45 AM
DON'T MESS WITH SENIORS!!! - by Hedgehog - 11-01-2010, 12:18 AM
Ten Thoughts to Ponder - by Hedgehog - 11-04-2010, 02:32 AM
Mathematical Equation - by Hedgehog - 11-06-2010, 12:19 AM
Any Excuse - by Hedgehog - 11-07-2010, 09:13 AM
Funny French - by Ashcloud - 11-12-2010, 08:44 PM
Keep Smiling - by Hedgehog - 11-15-2010, 08:44 AM
Dog vs Wife - by Hedgehog - 11-23-2010, 03:08 AM
CALIFORNIA LOVE STORY - by Hedgehog - 11-27-2010, 08:48 PM
Thing's to get you into trouble - by Hedgehog - 12-01-2010, 08:55 AM

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