Sick jokes:
How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face?
She answered the iron.
How did Helen Keller burn the other side of her face?
They called back.
How did Helen Keller burn her fingers?
Reading the waffle iron.
How did Helen Keller break her arm riding down the road?
Reading the stop sign.
What kind of wood don't float?
Natalie Wood.
Why didn't Natalie Wood shower on the yacht that night?
She preferred to wash up on shore.
Mommy, Mommy, why do I keep walking in circles?
Shut up or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!
Dad I hate sister's guts!
Shut up and eat whats's on your plate.
Mommy cna we have grandma for dinner?
No, we still have half of Aunt May in the fridge.
Mommy, Mommy, daddy fell off the roof!
I know dear, he just passed the window.
What's blue and sits in the corner?
A baby with a plastic bag on his head.
What's green and sits in the corner?
Same baby three days later.
What's red and goes brrump brrrump brrrump?
A baby playing with an electric fan.
Daddy, I want a new dog.
Shut up, we haven't finished eating the old one yet.
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