THE REMATCH: Leto (defender) vs Colonel T. (ass-aulter) -No access for Dave-

[Copper]

It's Romanians not Rumanians.Lol.

How would you know??? huh???

: )

I changed the spelling... just for you. Now you have to cheer for me M8, I'm using your countrymen!!

lol...

Cheers!

Leto

[Copper]

I am now assigning Blitz personalities for my various leadership positions.

With respect and admiration for our loyal Romanian webmaster, I am giving him the highest rank on the field. Mai Paduroiv will NOW be known as Mai (Major) Razuroiv, a bespectacled and insightful man that was once a mathematician at the University of Bucharest. His dream had always been to calculate binomials and find a way to share his knowledge with other uber geeks around the world using a ray cathode tube system interconnected by a long yarn of thread capable of transmitting data... but now finds himself fighting as a soldier, and leader of men. He will defeat the evh-ul Germans... they brought him into this war and smashed his dream of instant string yarn porn, err... instant communication!... the Germans will pay!

Okay Raz, it's official... you are now responsible for leading our troops to victory (or massive defeat...)!

Please sign up here for other ranks and positions:

Sol Dobre (the sharpshooter) NOW: Sol Fullhousebre (A crack Romanian sharpshooter that, despite his blindness, has become one of the most successful riflemen in Romanian military history... earning his skills in the mountain ranges, shooting at bats in the night, the good Sol once put a bullet through a Russian BT-7 by bouncing it off the hatch and then letting it go pinball loco inside the compartment, killing all 4 crewmen... as if the bullet was guided by a spirit all its own. Some say that Sol Fullhousebre is possessed by dark magic, and most men leave him to himself. When shooting, many people have heard him hum and chant)

Captain Chirita (A company)

Captain Dutu (B company)

Kaptain Dalmatov (Soviet SMG company)

LT. Maslennikov (Soviet tank platoon commander)

EFR Nazdatrenko (the useless Soviet TH unit) NOW: EFR COILzdatrenko. All his life, the good EFR was always the guy sent off to do the job with the wrong tools, or no tools at all, and often wound up on the point-ED end of the stick. Yet, somehow he managed to keep himself alive. In 1941, COILzdatrenko used a daring tactic of dressing up in a sheep skin and gliding into a Russian tank platoon bivouacked in a shephard's field, carrying nought but a diluted strength Molotov Cocktail consisting mostly of his own pee (still a considerable amount of alchohol as he had been drinking his weapon through the night, and then replacing it) and a large cucumber (to be used to stuff up the exhaust pipe of a T-26 if all else failed).

Unfortunately, COILzdatrenko's mission was cut short when a Soviet sheep-o-phile sentry spotted the uber sexy sheepskin covered COIL in the herd, and after instantly being smitten with love (and lust... well mostly lust) ended COILzdatrenko's attack with a rear flank attack of his own. COILzdatrenko never Baa'd so loudly in his life before.

Many other useless and dangerous endeavours plagued COILzdatrenko's military career across the many years of war. But he always survived... sometimes wishing he hadn't (he shudders as he is reminded of his rough treatment in the herd under the moonlight so many years ago)

Now, before this battle against their ex allies, and finding that he has been thrown into the lot with a familiar Soviet SMG trooper who once loved him as a beast so many years ago, COILzdatrenko wants nothing more than to end it all... he straps on his 2 useless MC's and hopes that he may actually, FINALLY achieve something before his most certain and horrifically unpleasant demise. (okay, I just re read this and have to admit, even I cracked up....LMAO)...

Sol Cliveti (the FT wielding wildman from Transylvania)

EFR MCIVAIUSHENKO (ATR crewmen) "VHAT a big gun you have dere!", the other AT crews laughed as IVAN walked by toting his Anti-Tank Rifle... For most of the war, and most of his life, IVAN had been afflicted with the disease of having a smaller gun than all the other soldiers in the AT companies. The Ukrainian girls laughed at him as they marched by, the other boys having to tow their much larger guns, while MCIVAIUSHENKO only had to carry his. They pointed at his little gun and laughed!! It was 1945, and by now, everyone else had bigger guns, but he was still carrying around his piddly little rifle. And he had never been able to penetrate anything with it yet.

"It's not the size of the gun, but where you aim it!" charged back MCIVAIUSHENKO. He sniffed and walked away, confident that he would vindicate his statement and finally bag himself a tank in the next battle. Oh sure, he'd killed a few kubelwagons, shot the wheel off an artillery wagon, and even pissed off an extremely fat squirrel with his ATR, but he had never EVER knocked out a panzer. But IVAN knew his luck was about to change. Unfortunately for IVAN, that luck was going to be changing the wrong way...

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First come first serve. I will weave you all into the DAR. If I get no volunteers for roles, I will just be assigning names out of a hat, or designated people for certain roles (like the COIL as Sol Coilet, responsible for cleaning the latrines, known for digging through othger men's (ahem) leavings for some strange little green things he thought he could find; and Sol POSterior, the mentally shortchanged battalion cook who always wanted to be a tank commander, but got bounced out of the armored service because he wanted to hunt in packs like a wolf, and in his first engagement, lost his entire platoon to a 45mm Russian AT gun that lined up all 3 R-1 tanks of his platoon and put a single AP shell through all three of them).


So sign up fast... those who do, I will make fun of less (and that is a relative assessment remember).

Cheers!

Leto

[Fullhouse]

I volunteer for sharp shooter duty.

[The Coil]

I want to be the Tank Hunter. I think I can pull off "useless" - small attainable goals, thats the key...

Edit: Hmmm...I'm not so sure I like being a part of this battle...

So, Leto, do I get to issue commands for my TH throughout the battle? Like, can I send you a PM that says something like "Ok, sneak him up to that patch of rough, then move to contact over to the trees. No, not those trees! The other ones. Back there a bit. Now over about 15 meters. No, 'move to contact', not 'run', you fool! Now it's too late...withdraw! Withdraw! *BOOM*." Something like that? Because that'd make me feel more involved.

[Copper]

I want to be the Tank Hunter. I think I can pull off "useless" - small attainable goals, thats the key...

Edit: Hmmm...I'm not so sure I like being a part of this battle...

So, Leto, do I get to issue commands for my TH throughout the battle? Like, can I send you a PM that says something like "Ok, sneak him up to that patch of rough, then move to contact over to the trees. No, not those trees! The other ones. Back there a bit. Now over about 15 meters. No, 'move to contact', not 'run', you fool! Now it's too late...withdraw! Withdraw! *BOOM*." Something like that? Because that'd make me feel more involved.

Simply: nope! I'm just attaching your name to a marionette in which I solely pull the strings... who knows, there may be a happy ending between you and the Soviet SMG sheep-o-phile?

Contract is signed and sealed... no backing out now M8.

But, depending on throwing me a few green apples, I may be able to help old COILzadetenko out here and there... perhaps accept a recommendation, or allow you to guide his fate a bit....

: )

Cheers!

Leto

[McIvan]

Leto]
EFR Nazdatrenko (the useless Soviet TH unit) NOW: EFR COILzdatrenko. All his life, the good EFR was always the guy sent off to do the job with the wrong tools, or no tools at all, and often wound up on the point-ED end of the stick. Yet, somehow he managed to keep himself alive. In 1941, COILzdatrenko used a daring tactic of dressing up in a sheep skin and gliding into a Russian tank platoon bivouacked in a shephard's field, carrying nought but a diluted strength Molotov Cocktail consisting mostly of his own pee (still a considerable amount of alchohol as he had been drinking his weapon through the night, and then replacing it) and a large cucumber (to be used to stuff up the exhaust pipe of a T-26 if all else failed).

Unfortunately, COILzdatrenko's mission was cut short when a Soviet sheep-o-phile sentry spotted the uber sexy sheepskin covered COIL in the herd, and after instantly being smitten with love (and lust... well mostly lust) ended COILzdatrenko's attack with a rear flank attack of his own. COILzdatrenko never Baa'd so loudly in his life before.

Many other useless and dangerous endeavours plagued COILzdatrenko's military career across the many years of war. But he always survived... sometimes wishing he hadn't (he shudders as he is reminded of his rough treatment in the herd under the moonlight so many years ago)

You just made me spit coffee all over my keyboard LMAO :)

That was very funny. You are an evil man :P

Sign me up as a valiant ATR gunner or whatever takes your fancy..

[Fullhouse]

Hey Leto, I just noticed that I dont have a custom title, so may not qualify as a forum personality.

However this is a good thing, the last thing a sniper needs is a personality, it just creates mental churn.

[The Coil]

EFR COILzdatrenko requests permission to do something...anything. Death by boredom is near. Are you guys hand drawing screenshots again? Is Dave waffling between the 500 LMG attack and the one super-elite Tiger (the rarity on those is a killer)?

During "Action" Report is getting to be a misnomer... :P

A useless redundant clicky to help you along...

[Copper]

EFR COILzdatrenko requests permission to do something...anything. Death by boredom is near. Are you guys hand drawing screenshots again? Is Dave waffling between the 500 LMG attack and the one super-elite Tiger (the rarity on those is a killer)?

During "Action" Report is getting to be a misnomer... :P

A useless redundant clicky to help you along...

Dave has been a no show... no reasons hoisted forth. And TBH, I now am extremely unmotivated to continue posting brilliant DAR's and helpful tactics and screenshots now that the free swinging era of 60's hippie love clickie giving is over.

I honestly have no reason to post here anymore... as sad as that sounds.

(god, I hope I do not sound like POS... LOL!)

Cheers!

Leto

[The Coil]

Yeah, old clickies were strangely motivating. New clickies seem hollow and empty.